And while generally speaking I consider myself an open book, there are a lot of things you may not know about me, and a lot I don’t share with anyone, a few close friends and fam aside.
While there are certainly some things I will forever keep closed off from social, I decided to make some confessions about myself, my Internet persona, and my life in general. Not only to help you get to know me better, but also so if you’re struggling with some of the stuff I struggle with and think you’re the only one, perhaps you can find comfort in knowing you’re not alone.
Sso here we go: 10 confessions from me to you:
1. On a daily basis, I eat boring and unbeautiful food.
As a food/health blogger and writer, I post pictures of my dinner plates on Insta or glamorshots of cookies for recipe posts. But IRL on the daily, I typically subside off of fruit, nut butter, bread, veggies, hummus and potatoes. Oh, and a crap load of chocolate.
I could eat a peanut butter sammy on wheat bread with fruit for lunch every day of the week and not get sick of it. I don’t eat this every day, but it happens a lot during the school year and I don’t mind my boring foods at all.
Not every dinner I eat is nicely plated and aesthetically pleasing. More typically I’m grazing on veggies and hummus and probably a granola bar while waiting for my sweet potatoes to finish microwaving so I can eat them with my fingers and oodles of salt because I live alone and have no need for proper manners.
Then maybe I’ll round out my meal with some microwaved Ikea veggie balls or plain cubed tofu dipped in hot sauce and/or ketchup (again with my finger), and follow that with a bowl of cereal with almond milk and vegan ice cream straight from the carton. All eaten standing at my countertop while wearing my sittin’ pants & probably watching something on Bravo. Instagram is a highlights reel for everyone (myself included) and don’t chu forget that!
2. I don’t like mint or coffee flavored desserts, Thin Mints being the only exception.
Yeah I know. Two of the most popular dessert flavors out there and I want nothing to do with them (hence why you’ve never seen any mint or coffee flavored desserts on my blog or insta).
Mint desserts remind me of toothpaste and confuses my tastebuds because I associate mint with clean teeth and not sugar. I can’t get into it.
And while I love coffee and drink iced coffee every day and love ice cream I despise coffee ice cream. Literally give me any other flavor over it. I know it doesn’t make sense. And if you’re confused, know I can’t figure this out either.
3. I have crippling anxiety.
I’m actually rather open about this. But I don’t think many people realize just how much anxiety impacts my life. I’m a mega worrier and catastrophizer and although some may have the impression that my life is somewhat put together inside I feel like a flailing mess 90% of the time.
I have panic attacks to the point of passing out and/or throwing up and always assume the worst possible outcome will be my reality. It’s exhausting. I’ve been working on it for years but dang man, the struggle is so real.
All that being said, I like to acknowledge select parts of my anxiety serve me well. I’m rarely late and don’t really procrastinate, mostly because both of these things make me anxious. So thanks for that, anxiety.
4. When people send me pics of my recipes or food they’ve made by me, or leave a nice comment on my blog or Instagram, it makes my whole entire day!
Seriously! It warms my heart and soul. The internet can be a rough place. Having worked in food media and writing for a while now, I’ve been subject to many many people scrutinizing my life, making wild assumptions about me, ripping me to shreds, and calling me all sorts of nasty things.
It doesn’t hurt me at all (anymore), but that said, when I see some positive words directed my way online, it warms me up. Even though I’ve had recipe posts go viral, I still can’t wrap my head around the fact that real people actually make the food I came up with sometimes. It’s mind-boggling!
And anytime anyone takes the time to post about a recipe of mine that they’ve made or comment something kind in response to my writing, or an email saying they appreciate something I wrote, it is so incredibly rewarding I swell up with joy inside. So thank you!
5. I’m a terrible speller.
Thank goodness for spell check!
6. I despise the scent of all perfumes and cologne.
They make my lungs itch and give me a headache! Perhaps I’m allergic? Can anyone relate?
7. I love the taste of Coke Zero. And I feel pretty meh about quinoa and eggplant.
Yeah I know. A health/nutrition blogger loves Coke Zero. Not Diet Coke, not regular Coke, but specifically Coke Zero. I’m well aware it’s all fake flavor/sugar/color. But you know what? On a hot day, a cold coke zero tastes great to me. JUDGE AWAY.
Oh, and PopTarts. When I’m mega stressed out they sound SO GOOD to me. Otherwise, I find them gross AF.
When it comes to quinoa, I think quinoa is fine, but I’d rather have any other grain (what up farro!), eggplant is too slimy for me. Guess I’ll never be a trendy main-stream quinoa salad vegan blogger! Oh well.
8. I’m not a perfect vegan.
I don’t know whether or not the sugar in my pantry is vegan. I recently found out the vitamin D in some of my cereals comes from a milk source and I still plan on finishing the box. I own wool socks that my mom made me. I’ll occasionally try bites of non-vegan desserts or cheeses, sometimes on purpose, sometimes by accident, sometimes to see if I “miss” them (usually, I don’t miss them and have realized I typically prefer the vegan version). I still have some non-vegan cosmetics and other products from before I started paying more attention.
But you know what? It’s really damn hard to be a perfect flawless 100% vegan unless you grow your own food, go out of your way to find vegan alcohols and wines (yeah, a lot of alc is not vegan), carefully source your own sugars, research all your boxed cereals and fortified goods, and are obsessive about every fabric or material good you purchase.
I do my damn best. Haven’t eaten meat in 20ish years and have been vegan for over 4. I now am much more careful about cruetly free cleaning and cosmetic products. But I don’t put pressure on myself to be flawless about veganism or anything. Cause that’s not realistic or sustainable
9. I can’t work a remote to save my damn life.
Seriously. I blame growing up without cable.
10. I’ve always wanted to get more into video
I’ve dabbled via freelance and on my own (like this truffle video and Millie’s new vlog). But it’s always something I’ve wanted to do more of. I think I’m just afraid no one will watch or care or think it’s dumb. I hold my own self back! But am working to change that.
This is something very few people know about me. Let me know if you liked this, and/or if you have questions you’d like me to answer. Thanks for reading! Love you the most!